. . .oh so funny. Famous for his overused line, "I can't get no respect," he was a comedian who appeared on the Tonight Show 70 times. Rodney starred along side Bill Murray and Chevy Chase in "Caddyshack," and released his first comedy album,"No Respect," in 1980, which went on to a win a Grammy that same year. Rodney's autobiography, "It's Not Easy Bein' Me: A Lifetime of No Respect but Plenty of Sex and Drugs," was published in 2004, and documented his fast-paced life and heart-related surgeries. Rodney Dangerfield died on October 6, 2004, but his words still live on to make people laugh.
A girl phoned me the other day and said... Come on over, there's nobody home. I went over. Nobody was home.
I came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand.
I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face.
I found there was only one way to look thin, hang out with fat people.
I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me.
I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. He told me to wear a brown tie.
I was so ugly my mother used to feed me with a sling shot.
I'm taking Viagra and drinking prune juice - I don't know if I'm coming or going.
My mother had morning sickness after I was born.
My wife met me at the door the other night in a sexy negligee. Unfortunately, she was just coming home.
My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive.
My wife was afraid of the dark... then she saw me naked and now she's afraid of the light.
On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me.
One year they asked me to be poster boy - for birth control.
This morning when I put on my underwear I could hear the fruit-of-the-loom guys laughing at me.
We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we
take separate vacations - we're doing everything we can to keep our
marriage together.
When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.
When I was born, I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother.
With me, nothing goes right. My psychiatrist said my wife and I should have sex every night. Now, we'll never see each other!
Yeah, I know I'm ugly... I said to a bartender, 'Make me a zombie.' He said 'God beat me to it.'
Recent Posts
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ANNIE LEIBOVITZ. . .ONE GREAT PHOTOGRAPHER. . .
. . .these photos come from the Dream Portrait Series, an advertisement campaign from Disney, featuring celebrities as traditional Disney characters. These images were taken in 2007.
Where Every Cinderella Story Comes True
Scarlet Johansson, as Cinderella
Where You're the Fairest of Them All
Rachel Weisz, Snow White
Where Dreams Run Free
Jessica Biel, as Pocahontas
Where You're Always the Kind of the Court
Roger Federer, as King Arthur
Where You Never Have to Grow Up
Mikhail Baryshnikov, as Peter Pan, Gisele Bundchen, as Wendy, and Tina Fey as Tinkerbell
Where Imagination Saves the Day
David Beckham, as Prince Philip from Sleeping Beauty
Where Magic Begins
Julie Andrews, as the Blue Fairy from Pinocchio, and Abigail Breslin, as Fira from the Disney Fairies
Where A Whole New World Awaits
Jennifer Lopez, as Jasmine, and Marc Anthony, as Aladdin
Where Wonderland is Your Destiny
Beyonce, as Alice, Lyle Lovette, as March Hare, and Oliver Platt, as Mad Hater
Where Your Every Wish is Our Command
Whoopi Goldberg, as the Genie
PHOTOGRAPHIC DICTIONARY. . .
. . .a visual definition. Stripe, by Federico Ciamei. AWESOME!
FACEBOOK. . .
. . .apparently there is no age limitation on Facebook, because when I put my birthdate into my profile, they accepted me. So, I now have 6 whole friends on Facebook, and I'm feeling a little lonely. If you have a Facebook page, and you want to be my friend, then click and I will enthusiastically accept you. One can never have enough friends. Now I sound like Mr. Rodgers!!!!
SOMETHING TO DO DURING RETIREMENT. . .
. . .CLUSTER BALLOONING. LOOKS LIKE A LOT OF FUN, EVEN THOUGH I'M AFRAID OF HEIGHTS.
HOW CUTE IS THIS. . .
Umbra Doodlebook Frame 80 page multi-colored sketching pad and a 4 X 6 opening for your favorite photograph.
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY. . .
. . .wishing all of you a wonderful day. Just some images that make me happy. ENJOY!
MAN ON WIRE. . .DOCUMENTARY. . .
Philippe Petit, a French tightrope walker, is the Man on Wire, a tale of his quest to walk between the World Trade Towers in NYC. To prepare for this feat, he practiced on the Notre Dame Cathedral, and on the northern pylons of the Sydney Harbour Bridge, above. No safety cables, no nets, just one man and a wire.
It is against the law to perform these feats, but amazingly Philippe escaped jail time. When he was being arrested after his Harbour Bridge feat, he even picked the watch straight off the arm of the arresting officer! He committed all sorts of illegal feat in the 6 years of planning that went into his World Trade Tower project, but even the policemen who waited for him on the north tower wasn't immune to his charm.
Even the movie trailer looks amazing.
